So… on the first day I woke up I followed procedure and pinged back to base. And the day after, and the day after that too, but I have yet to receive any confirmation response, which I certainly should have by now. I mean come on guys. It’s a Code 200?!? Doesn’t feel like too much to ask.

I’m still able to establish a connection with the satellites, So not sure why no one is responding, but since I have this other medium for communications. Could any one who works at, or knows someone that sorts at, Paradigm please ping me back thanks.

And to the rest of you, please do feel free to besiege the customer service centre over there with any number of requests via whatever medium you like. #Deepspacejohnfans and all that.

Anyway, I feel like I’ve misled you all, because I have misled you all, and I’ve also misled the guys at Paradigm so I feel like I should come clean now. Maybe it was the computer talking to me like Uncle Phil that’s triggered this, or maybe I always planned on coming clean once I was beyond capture.

I dexcribed myself some days ago as a bit of a blah copywriter with no real ambition, limited enjoyment in life and a solipcistic personality.

Well, maybe it would be better to think of me as one of those people whose neighbours describe them as very quiet and keeps themselves to themselves. That is of course the sort of description people save for their neighbours only after they’ve commited some horrendous act.

And, in terms of solipscism, that’s true I guess. But maybe it’s more accurate to say I’ve learned to keep myself to myself because  can’t trust anyone else with my secrets. There’s nothing that can’t be improved with practise after all. Free divers make their way down to the deeps, they don’t just crush their lungs on their first attempts.

It’s pretty clear to, I suppose, that for someone who has claimed a career in copywriting I’m not exactly succinct and to the point. A good copywriter can say in a handful of words what it could take another person hundreds and look at me, I struggle to present a coherent thought in just one of these posts.

The bit I find someone surprising, however, is that a person like Greg St John, who has pretty much all the resources in the world, vetted me and found nothing. That is not a plausible analysis to my mind, so Greg, am calling you out to. I think you knew and you sent me anyway. Doesn’t make you an accomplice, hell, I can’t imagine there’s a law against sending people like me out in to the stars, but in as much as you’ve helped me escape justice… I don’t know.

I think I’ll leave you all on this cliff hanger now. I wonder if I’ll get a ping back now! Suspect I will.